Why Being Unhappy is a GOOD ThingMar 21, 2018
Welcome! If you don't know me yet, my name is Becca Starr and I'm here to remind you of how perfect and beautiful you already are. You don't need to do much, but I do give you lots of great strategies to live an extraordinary life and really connect and prosper in your exceptionalism. We all have it, we just need to let go of a lot of things and maybe do more of the right things rather than the not-right things.
Today, we're talking about why it's actually a good thing to be unhappy. Sounds crazy, but stay with me here.
When we look at our lives from all angles - past, present, future, and different areas of our lives, let's say all of the main areas, which would be relationships, career, fun, money, your health, your body, adventure, travel, personal and spiritual development, when you hear those categories, there's probably one or more that could stick out to you right away. You know as you hear them that you're not happy or feeling complete and whole in that area.
For me, I did my own check with these main categories before the show, and it was the relationship and fun area that stood out to me as being more unfulfilling right now. These are areas I kind of even feel like a failure in if I was to step back, take a little scan of how I'm doing, how I'm feeling.
But the truth is, you would never know it by looking at my life, and I wasn't even really aware of it until I took that minute to just see each category objectively and how it felt for me.
So I want to go over them one more time. Just pick one or two, so you can listen to this whole show with some more intention as we continue and get in touch with these amazing strategies that are really going to make use of your unhappiness.
You could have some other area, but these are some real basic categories that are a good starting point for anyone of us. So pick one or two, do your little scan, and decide what you're not happy with.
It's sometimes easy to think we're fine or we're good, whatever we tell ourselves to not look or feel too much if we're not happy in something. But here's the thing: If we didn't feel unhappy with something, we would never change it. The unhappiness, rather than something to judge as wrong or bad, is key information. Yes, it's telling you something isn't right in this part of your life. And yes, it probably doesn't feel good, but there's some really good news I'm going to dish up for you right now.
Understanding the gift you could receive, having the smallest understanding of this, might help you to walk through situations you feel stuck in or discouraged by and begin to see them from a completely different perspective. We'll go more into detail about steps you can take to speed through those parts of your journey with a heck of a lot more grace, but I want to mention first, if you're able to see this more as important information for you, you'll accomplish two things by doing this. One, you'll feel better. You will feel more empowered. You won't feel like a victim or a prisoner even, stuck where you are. It's easy to feel stuck, and it takes you out of that because you're clearly defining the separation between the problem and you. Who you really are is definitely not the problem.
The second benefit to becoming aware of this unhappiness being of value to you is that you'll begin to see things relating to it as more possibility. There are more answers to your problem than you might have ever realized. When you're just focused on the situation as being a negative experience that you're stuck in, you kind of take yourself out of that focus and shift into more of one of possibility, and you begin to pay attention more to possibility and see it more. Not that it's not already there, but you just see it a lot easier.
Let's talk about how to turn this information, this feeling of being unhappy, into a new experience, one that brings you tons of joy. Once you can define the area and you admit it, just become aware that you're not happy with it, open your mind to the fact this is like this because something way better is trying to come through for you. That's the truth, my beautiful friend, and I want you to understand that. And here's how I know. I've been doing this work for more than 20 years, and every single time the unhappiness shows up, I accept it, clarify what I really want, and then stay open to what's trying to come in, and every single time, the new situation that was trying to come into my life is incredibly better than I ever imagined it would be.
And I imagined. I'm a visualizer. I'm someone who writes a list or some sort of claim to what I desire. I imagine it to be great, and every time it's better than what I thought it could be. If you want to know my secrets to this, you'll have to join us for one of my upcoming workshops. I love giving you a wealth of information to help you connect with your beauty and power, right here through this audio platform, so that you can hear my voice, my experience, my coaching. You can get all of this information at your fingertips, but there's something to the experience of courageously walking through the entire process.
For now, let's cover these following steps you can take to see the positive change right away, to really feel happy and confident in your future, in this area of your life, to see a transformation. Like I said, accept what is. Clarify what you'd like. Record it somehow. Write it down. It can be a list, a journal entry, a letter to your future self. It can be a vision board. We recently did a great show and have an article with resources at BeccaStarr.com, all about vision boards. And once you've clarified what you want, the simplest step I can leave you with is to be open to messages from the universe. Let yourself stay in the receptivity of what to do next, and when you get a feeling, it's that feeling, it's your intuition, or it feels like a hit or that small still voice.
It's not a panicky feeling or anxious or nervous. It doesn't come from that place, and it can be some conversation you're having with somebody. It can be a sign, it could be something within you. Begin to be more aware of these types of feelings, and the step that's important to take here is action. You act on the feelings of intuition. It's very important. Knowledge might be considered power, but to me, it's just more information. Nothing changes if you don't take actual action. It requires a boldness and a faith. It will require you to step out of your comfort zone, so whether you're looking for a new job or for your soulmate, whatever it is you've decided, you'll get there. I promise that. It's up to you how fast or slow you want to go.
I get impatient myself. I have a very low tolerance level to unhappiness, but some people can stay uncomfortable a lot longer than I can. There's no judgment. I just want you to know it's up to you. We become aware and accept we're really not happy with something. We understand that it's all right. We know it's useful information, and we begin to get clear on what we want. From there, we pay attention. We act with courage, we trust our intuition, and we take action. We keep the faith. We're opening a chapter in the book of our life. We're helping to write that chapter. We feel empowered, we honor ourselves, and we share this beauty with the world. We get to live a life of fullness and joy and gratitude.
I love our Sunday message we usually post on our private Facebook group. There's always something to be thankful for, and the more we know this, and the more we share it, the more the things we're grateful for multiply. I invite you to join us over there in our private Facebook community. It's a strong group of women, beautiful goal-getters. And if you're ready to join our VIP Workshop, take advantage of the early registration discount. You can find out a lot more at BeccaStarr.com/workshops.
Have a beautiful, extraordinary day, and I'll be back on Monday with your motivation for the week. I'd love to hear what you got most out of this episode. Comment on our webpage, send me an email. Let us know. We're here to support you. Thanks for listening and have a beautiful day.
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